Istantidbits III

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More Turkish Delights:
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UNSPED
A delivery service.
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TOP MODELS
Sadly, a shop featuring remote controlled toys
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ORGANIC TOPLESS
While I have always preferred toplessness to be organic, this is unfortunately only a fashionable clothing shop for women in Ortakoy.
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TITIZ
North America has Hooters, but Turkey has Titiz. While Hooters has a large, varied menu, Titiz specializes in chicken, our favorite being slowly spit-roasted birds, scissor-snipped in half before being wrapped in heat-retaining aluminum/paper foil. Clearly, both franchises depend heavily upon breast meat.
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Random Observations:
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1. No Squirrels in Istanbul: Whether it is due to the sustained human presence here, the lack of enough large green spaces, or the millions of feral cats, I have yet to see a squirrel, despite my many hours spent reading in the Kurucesme cemetery.
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2. T-Shirts: These are favored apparel among the younger set. What is striking is that the inscriptions are almost universally in English. The most popular include invented American colleges (Univ. of Cal. South, Texas Univ., etc., but never Notre Dame), and variations on Abercrombie and Fitch: A & Fitch, Abc. & F, A & F, Fitch, usually with dates in the 1920s. The lettering is frequently raised and frayed, to give it that "authentic" 1920s T-shirt look.
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3. DURACAK: When you are about to reach your bus stop, you struggle your way to your feet, fighting gravity, inertia and overcrowding, and press a red button on one of the metal rails that surround the interior of the vehicle. This alerts the driver of your intention to leave the bus. A lighted panel comes on above his head, reading DURACAK, and gives him an approximation of the exit door nearest to where you pushed the button. It also lets other passengers know that they were correct in waiting for you to fight their way up to push the button.
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Here’s my problem: “Duracak” is pronounced ‘doo-rah-jock’, so every time I push the button and the little sign lights up above the driver’s head, my brain sings, “Hit ‘doo-rah-jock,’ an’ don’t’cha come back no mo,’ no mo, hit ‘doo-rah-jock,’ an’ don’t’cha back no mo.’” ARRGGH!
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More Fonetik Spelinj:
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Akustik = Acoustic
Akvaryum = Aquarium
Biyoloji = Biology
Deterjan = Detergent
Dizayn = Design
Ekselans = Excellence
Etiket = Etiquette
Fisikal = Physical
Ingilizce = English
Kokteyl Sosis = Cocktail Sausage
Konferans = Conference
Konsantre = Concentrate
Lobi = Lobby
Meksika = Mexico
Milyon = Million
Pasifik = Pacific
Portekiz = Portuguese
Promosyon = Promotion
Ritim = Rhythm
Sosyal = Social

Meanderthal
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He walks at night, solitary, senses on edge. His eyesight, dim during the daytime, is enhanced by the darkness. His occasional companion is a large neighborhood dog (male, Golden Lab-Mastiff mix) that he has named Rufus. The Meanderthal has never given Rufus anything but love. Others leave him food, but shoo him away when he comes near. When the Meanderthal is walking with Rufus and others dogs or humans approach, Rufus growls a deep, menacing warning. Meanderthal has a friend.
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On a clear night, the Asian side of the Bosphorous looks to the Meanderthal like a huge black opal pendant viewed horizontally through a magnifying glass. The lights from the thousands of artificial light-sources behind the hills (east) create a sparkling, undulating skyline. From there to the water, the sharp colors of daytime blend into the softer hues of beige, orange and blue. Celebratory fireworks from behind the skyline add frequent, silent accents.
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The Bosphorous Bridge offers a free light-show every night. It is a huge suspension bridge, with an aerodynamic deck hanging on zigzag steel cables. Upon completion in 1973, it was the world’s longest suspension bridge outside the U.S.A. The pillars and all the cables are covered with alternating lights in primary colors. Therefore, the colors can be manipulated to blend into secondary and tertiary colors. The lights can also be flashed or tiled in different sequences, vertically, horizontally, diagonally, or in waves that change color several times in differing combinations of color and direction. All this takes place while vehicles are moving over the bridge at speed. If he were driving, the Meanderthal would not survive due to acute artistic distraction.
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Rufus visits Meanderthal during the daytime, when he is reading in the cemetery. For such a large dog, Rufus moves very quietly, and frequently surprises Meanderthal when he suddenly appears on a grave above him, snuffling a moist welcome. Meanderthal puts down his book (he’s been rereading Tolstoy's "War and Peace") and vigorously scratches Rufus under the chin. If Meandertahl returns to his book before Rufus feels he’s had enough scratching, he lets Meanderthal know by softly whining and nudging his shoulder with drool. Rufus is never refused more attention.
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Meanderthal has moved to another temporary shelter, away from his favorite haunts. He still walks at night, but without the black opal pendant, the lighted bridge and, especially, without Rufus.

The Floating Island

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Almost directly below our hilltop vantage point is a floating island, a large, rectangular, commercial platform anchored to the shale floor of the Bosphorous. This artificial island was constructed by an organization supporting a local, wealthy professional football team, Galatasaray (a compound word with five "A"s!). Galata* is a district of Istanbul on the north-eastern tip of the Golden Horn, originally a Genoese enclave. Saray is the Turkish word for "palace."
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The floating Galata Palace features four restaurants, a disco (with lights that flash so intensely that I worry for the epileptics), and an Olympic-sized swimming pool (empty in winter, illuminated with blue lights in summer; although I have seen people jogging around the decks, I have never seen anyone swimming in the pool). There must be all sorts of things I cannot see from my perch on the cliffs above. Maybe the Divine Ms. N. and I will make a visit before we move to Ulus (a district closer to the school) in July. All we have to do is make a reservation at one of the restaurants, walk down to the water, climb aboard one of the constantly circling shuttle boats, step aboard the Palace, announce our restaurant reservations (pretending to be tourists), then find unobtrusive reasons to go exploring. (I’m very good at doing this sort of thing very badly, but I apologize and blush well, and have yet to be arrested.) We’ll see ...
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Now that summer has arrived, the Galata Palace has become the host to frequent, annoyingly loud outdoor concerts. Hundreds of chairs are set up on the Asian side of the floating platform. A stage is constructed during the day and taken down the next morning (unless there is another cacophonausea event scheduled for the following evening). The stage, situated at the southern end of the platform, consists of three walls mounted with huge video screens that show ... what? Flashes of live performers? Videos from a simultaneous off-platform concert? I don’t care ...
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So many people attend these events that entrepreneurs consider it worth the expense to send out illuminated billboards aboard small motor boats. These craft feature brightly lit signs that scroll up and down with alternating advertisements. I cannot see what they are peddling, but it’s a good guess that chocolate is in there somewhere.
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*Being Christians, the citizens of Galata unsuccessfully tried to protect Constantinople during the siege of 1453 by stretching a heavy metal chain across the mouth of the Horn, preventing the Ottoman navy from entering this vital estuary. The chain worked for the simple reason that the Genoese ships, designed for deep waters and wind power, rose much higher above the water than the Turkish vessels. The Turkish boats had sails but depended more upon oar power (provided by slaves who were chained to their benches). So whenever the Turks approached the chain, the Genoese would rain down a hail of arrows on them that would thwart the attack. This tactic worked until Sultan Mehmet Fatih (Mehmet the Conqueror) ordered that the Turkish boats be hauled overland and refloated in the Golden Horn at its brackish western end. After that, Galata was doomed, the large sailing vessels trapped by their own chain. Pieces of the chain can still be found (and touched) at different museum sites around the city.